Creating Safe Spaces: A Guide to using spaces to soothe past trauma
- Craig Newman
- Mar 17
- 3 min read
After experiencing trauma, certain places can feel overwhelming or even unsafe—even if there’s no immediate danger. These feelings can arise at home, at work, in public, or even in familiar spaces. The good news? You can take control by creating intentional safe spaces that help you feel grounded, calm, and in control.
Rather than being caught off guard when distress arises, this guide will help you plan ahead, ensuring you have physical spaces, objects, and strategies ready to support you when you need them most.
Step 1: Identify Where You Need a Safe Space
The first step in creating safety is recognizing where you feel the most vulnerable. Ask yourself:
Where do I feel most unsafe or triggered?
At home – Certain rooms, nighttime, or reminders of the past.
At work – Stressful meetings, difficult people, or overwhelming environments.
In public – Shops, public transport, crowded places, or being alone outside.
Understanding where you feel the most distress will help you focus on building safety where you need it most.
Take a moment to reflect:"I often feel most unsafe or triggered at ______________."
Step 2: Designing a Safe Space at Home
Your home should have at least one intentionally calming space where you feel safe, grounded, and in control. This doesn’t have to be an entire room—it can be a corner, a chair, or even just a section of a bed.
How to Create a Safe Space at Home:
✔️ Softness & Comfort: Add a weighted blanket, soft cushions, or a warm hoodie.
✔️ Grounding Objects: Keep a smooth stone, stress ball, or a familiar, comforting item nearby.
✔️ Safe Lighting: Use fairy lights, dim lamps, or blackout curtains to create a peaceful atmosphere.
✔️ Calming Sounds: Play nature sounds, soft music, or use a white noise machine.
✔️ Aromas & Scents: Use essential oils, chamomile tea, or a familiar perfume.
✔️ Journaling or Affirmation Cards: Write down calming thoughts or reminders for when anxiety rises.
Step 3: Bringing a Sense of Safety to Public & Workspaces
You may not be able to control every environment, but you can bring elements of safety with you wherever you go. Small adjustments can make stressful environments more manageable.
How to Create Safe Anchors in Public or at Work:
✔️ Carry a Grounding Kit: Keep a small sensory item in your pocket or bag (a stone, scented oil, or fidget item)
.✔️ Have an Exit Plan: Identify a nearby place where you can step away if needed.
✔️ Use Earphones & Music: Block out noise in stressful public spaces.
✔️ Personalise Your Desk or Work Area: Add a small plant, calming photo, or scent to make the space feel safer.
✔️ Find a Quiet Space Nearby: Know where to go if you need a moment alone—a breakroom, a quiet café, or a park.
In your Journal: "When I feel overwhelmed at [fill in location], I will [fill in action] to feel safer."
Step 4: Planning for Triggers Instead of Being Surprised by Them
Triggers can feel unpredictable, but many follow a pattern. Preparing for them in advance gives you a sense of control over your emotional responses.
Think about a common trigger:"I often feel triggered by ______________."
Now, create a response plan:"When this happens, I will ______________ (go to my safe space, use my grounding item, listen to music, etc.)."
Example:"When I feel overwhelmed at work, I will step outside for fresh air and use my essential oil roller."
By having a plan before distress happens, you are less likely to feel stuck or powerless when triggers arise.
Final Thoughts: Safety is More Than Just a Physical Space
Feeling safe isn’t just about where you are—it’s about having the right tools, routines, and mindset to protect your emotional well-being.
✔️ Your home should have a safe space.
✔️ Your bag should have grounding tools (see links below for ideas).
✔️ Your mind should have a plan.
The more you prepare for distress, the less power it will have over you. Take small steps today to create environments and strategies that help you feel more secure, wherever you go.
